Friday, May 22, 2009

of course it is

May 22, 2009

A lot has happened. I found out that I'm pregant (woops) which is [cough, cough] still awkward to say. I'm not keeping it. Being pregant sucks by the way. I just feel sick, my boobs won't stop hurting, and on top of that all of my guts feel like they are moving around to make room for the little gremlin who is in my belly. It's not cool, and there is nothing magical about it.

When I called my boyfriend to say, "hey so guess who's pregnant, that isn't supposed to be able to naturally concieve" he said, "oooh well I guess there isn't anything I can't do". He found it hilarious, I can't really be more thankful for everyones sense of humour. It sucks, but there is a lot to laugh about.

I went to "the clinic" with a couple friends for moral support who spent the time yelling random things at my stomach, and saying to anyone who said "abortion" to "shh" and they would cover my stomach, "not in front of the baaaby". My friends, are from a bad comedy, with the worst sense of humour in the world...thank god.

Speaking of god, I'm not religious but am I going to hell for an abortion? I mean, it's only OOONE, it's not like my fifth one or something. Speaking of fifth one, I worked with a girl at starbucks once who had four. FOUR. How the hell do you get pregnant four times?

Yes, I'm the pregnant girl who is judging. I'm judgemental.

I went to the clinic to have the abortion, but the spanish lady said in between talking on her cell phone, while probing my vagina, "i can't see no babies here...is too soon!" So I'm only 3 weeks or so, meaning they won't take the bun out of the oven until it's been baked a little longer. Isn't that weird?

My room-mate asked me, "isn't it amazing feeling something growing inside of you?" NO. The answer is no. I don't feel something growing inside of me, I just feel sick, and like i'm retaining water. Also, it has a knife and it keeps stabbing me. The baby, though only a tadpole, is really rude.

I have eight more days left and counting.

May 30th, little stabby gremlin go bye bye.

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